Being a first time mom you just don't know what's normal and what's not all the time so I thought I would ask you other mothers what your experience is.
Kate pretty much has to be held 24/7. She will fall asleep in our arms but the second we lay her down she wakes up and fusses.
She is also on no feeding schedule at all. Sometimes she will eat every 3-4 hours but then sometimes its like she wants the bottle in her mouth 24/7 but then falls asleep and doesn't really eat, but of course if I take the bottle away, she wakes up and cries but the binky won't suffice. Overall she is eating well and gaining weight so I'm not worried about that, a schedule would just be nice though.
Is this all normal? At what point do they start having an actual schedule? Do we have to force a schedule or will she eventually gravitate to one on her own? Will she ever be content and awake without being held so I can get things done during the day?
5 comments:
it's normal but you will try and set the pace of a schedule. Let her cry once and awhile but not for long 15 min. Give it some time and talk to her dr. he will give you good advise.
Ya its normal its hard to get them on a schedule but it will come, I know some of my babies would be fine in their chair esp Kell she sometimes would only sleep in that. I did let them cry thats the only way they learn turn a vacuum on or music but don't let it go to long. With Kell she had colic and the sucking helped her tummy so she always wanted to suck, we did take drives a lot too she would fall asleep in the car. Good luck.
Normal. Small babies don't have a schedule at first. Within the next few months you'll realize patterns in her eating, crying, sleeping etc. I would build on those patterns and start a schedule. I started Coleman on a night time schedule really early...bath, lotion, feeding, hum a song then lights out. It actually worked. It took weeks for him to not cry and need soothing from me, but Kate will eventually, like all babies, teach herself how to self soothe and sleep. Within a few months Coleman got the routine. If you want to start a schedule there will be crying...but crying has never hurt a baby, just pat her belly every 5 mins or so and let her know you are there. It's very tedious at first, but pretty soon she'll cry for a little time and then be asleep. (Some babies get hysterical, if that's the case, they might be overly tired or hungry and need to be picked up and rocked or whatever) Babies just don't know how to self entertain and self soothe. I'd put Coleman down to shower or make the bed and he'd cry, and I would be all frazzled. Eventually I just would reassure him with my voice or stroke him for a second and then get back to the chores, even if he was still upset. Pretty soon he liked to play and lay there while I did things, and he'd even start watching me without crying. The eating thing changes SO MUCH because they are growing and changing SO MUCH at first. It's a little harder to get the eathing thing down to a science. If babies are hungry they will eat, if not, they won't. It's hard to tell. All babies are different too. My sis-in-law still co-sleeps with her 3 year old... I decided on a routine, and she decided on co-sleeping whenever her kid was tired. It's just up to you.
McKenzie I fed on a schedule, but the other two I have just fed whenever they were hungry, and it was a lot better to just follow their lead. I had a set schedule for naps and bedtime, and they fell into somewhat of a schedule for eating where they would eat around the same time each day, but I didn't feed according to the clock (as my doctor would say). If that makes sense. It is okay to let her cry for a little while. With McKenzie we would pick her up at every cry/sound and it was so much harder to wean her and get her to sleep on her own without being rocked to sleep or held. Scott and I joke sometimes that we would love to "do" the baby stages of McKenzie all over again knowing what we know now because she was by far our hardest baby, but I don't know how much of that was do to our first time parents syndrome versus her personality! There are so many different parenting styles out there. You just need to find out what works best for the two of you and you'll figure it out! If you have any other questions, we're just up the street :) Don't hesitate!
Zoe was the same way -- I held her 24 hours a day or she would cry. My friend gave me a book called "Babywise" which saved my life. I didn't use the exact system because I thought it was too regimented -- and because I couldn't let Zoe cry for very long. But I more-or-less used the system to get her on a schedule and it worked like a charm. She was sleeping through the night by 2 1/2 months. And I could put her down for a nap without holding her all day.
It basically has a schedule of feeding, awake/play time, then nap time, then repeat. You might want to check it out and see if it might work for you.
Good luck!!
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